Audio Available
"Many have been struggling to keep their wits and sanity during the pandemic. Although it’s been 2 years, many still battle anxiety, depression and loss of confidence, and things are far from normal. This week, Kristene shares her piece on how she managed to get some of her life back in control after letting it spiral for far too long. Hope you are blessed and gain something from this article!"
by Kristene Silva Marie
I shudder to think about what would have happened to me if I had kept on the path I was on five years ago. A path of a terribly unhealthy lifestyle and no regard for my body.
I was an active kid and even in my teens, I never really put on weight no matter what I ate.
Yes, I really miss those times too. When I was 17 (though in my heart of hearts, I still am) I used to joke about how I eat when I’m stressed. Especially during the exam season when I ate a lot of junk food and cookies.
Looking back, I had no idea what stress actually meant, and the reason I ate those cookies was probably because Christmas was just around the corner and the cookie mode was ON!
I only truly understood stress eating around 2016. Here is what my eating schedule looked like, and let me warn you, it’s intense!
7am - Buy one bun & coffee at gas station (on the way to work)
8.45am - Go to the cafeteria to pack breakfast (a bun is not a proper breakfast for a “growing
child”)
12pm - Lunchtime (because, duh!)
5pm - Pre-dinner/dinner (I do a lot of work, mental work, so obviously I feel hungry)
8pm - Buy instant noodles/instant anything from the vending machine (See, I work so
hard, I don’t even have time for a proper dinner and the cafeteria is closed. Poor me.)
12am - Dinner at home (I worked late today, I’m tired and it was a long day, I need to
eat a good dinner.)
Most of the food above being carbs and sugar, this was my eating pattern from the end of 2016 to 2018. And the reasons I kept giving myself were so convincing, I believed every bit of it. I mean, I DID work hard, and a lot, and late! So all my rationale was... rational, at least to me.
I had put on weight so rapidly, my body couldn’t keep up. My feet and knees hurt all the time and psychologically, I was at a point where I just gave up on myself.
I couldn’t bear to look in the mirror or buy new clothes because I felt there was no point.
Sure, I still put on make-up when going to work, I still dressed in formal clothing (in the ones that fit, at least) but it was not something I wanted to do more than something I HAD to do.
There were times in these last few years when I would get momentarily excited about working out, going on a diet or making some kind of change, but these fizzled out pretty quickly because, in retrospect, they were all due to external motivation.
Somebody probably said something encouraging to me like, “Kristene, don’t give up, you are beautiful. Think of your future, of your health” or “Hey, you wanna join me on a diet? It’s only 10 days so let’s give it a go”, or perhaps because I read something inspiring about some celebrity who lost a heck of a lot of weight and looked so good.
But it wasn’t until 2020 that things took a turn for me. First of all, I stopped sugar altogether.
Then, I did one better, I decided to get back into something I’ve always enjoyed - dancing.
Not surprisingly, dancing is one of the fun ways to complete your cardio quota, so, check.
I knew getting back into it was gonna take some serious sweating and panting, but for the first time in years, I was up for it. See, it had been more than 10 years since I actively danced, because, how many of you agree that it gets real noisy up in the brain once you start working?
So, where I used to have a million things in my head and texts from bosses blowing up my phone, there was silence. Everything in my head was clear. I was done with work by 1pm and honestly, had nothing lined-up after that, zilch.
I am very thankful for this window of opportunity that allowed me to get started and regret that it took this drastic change to get me started.
Fast forward a year, I am nowhere close to a perfect body but you know what, I am so enjoying every bit of this journey.
I used to feel so sad and guilty for not taking care of this body God has blessed me with.
Finally, I don’t feel that way anymore. I have lost 10kgs since I began, and I feel so much stronger, physically and emotionally than I used to.
Miraculously, I have simply stopped craving any sort of junk food but I am not on any crazy diets other than eating my usual meals at the right time.
You may be wondering why I am sharing all of this. It’s because I just thought about how embarrassingly long it took me to get started, even with my mom’s constant pointing out (nagging) and advice of genuine concern from those who care about me.
If you are anything like me, getting started is tough. I used to come up with a million logical reasons why I could not.
I blamed the lack of time, pointed out that there were no results after so long (even if I had only tried for two days), or the ultimate excuse, nationality - “What to eat? We’re in Malaysia, everything is sugar and carbs”.
So, honestly I am just here to urge you, my type of people, the question is do you want a change? Not because of a goal weight or a perfect body, but to feel better, to know you have started something that is on the right track. Do you want to feel proud of your little milestones when you look at yourself in the mirror?
If you do, get up and start.
Don’t think about it, just start.
If you don’t like to dance, here are some other ways you can get your heart pumping:
1. Clean up
Yes, I meant dust, sweep and mop. Not only will you be sweating by the end of it, you will have a very satisfyingly clean abode. (And all neat freaks like me say..?)
2. Walk in the park
Put on your mask, face shield and gloves if you need, plug in your earphones with a great playlist then go crazy jogging or walking until you sweat.
3. Walk your dog
You and your dog will benefit from this, and you’ll be your fur baby's favourite. Two birds, baby!
4. Jump rope
It costs less than RM10 on online stores and it does wonders! You can even start joining some fun TikTok challenges with it.
5. Punch your stress away
Great way to release pent up anger or de-stress, and get your sweat on.
Ok so lastly, once you have begun, please, please don’t start hogging the weighing machine and obsessing over your measurements.
Take it easy, take it slow and remember why you started in the first place. For a change. Enjoy the process, you are not in a race.
Take care.
by Kristene Silva Marie
Team Courage
Comentarii