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Self-Doubt

"Self-discovery seems to be a lifelong journey, but who says you must be filled with doubt and insecurities while on it? As Robert Morley said, “To fall in love with yourself is the first secret to happiness.” This week's article gives practical tips on how to begin overcoming self-doubt and embracing YOU with confidence!" #loveyourself


by Jessica Daniel

So you’re deep in thought, about your life, about your relationships, about your unknown future and what do you know?


The voice of self-doubt creeps in and suddenly you’re plagued with doubts of who you are and you begin to believe you’re not good enough for anyone or anything.


Has that ever happened to you? Because that happens to me.


"The torment you feel from being constantly let down, whether it is when you meet someone new or when you desire to excel at your job but somehow you keep making mistakes, or when you hope to be more available for someone who is in need but can’t - these are instances that will definitely open doors to self-doubt. "

But allowing it in is only setting yourself up for failure before anything bad happens. In short, stop selling yourself short.


There are 99 problems, but unhealthy self-doubt should not be one of them.


Now, there are differences between self awareness and self-doubt but it is important to know the difference because one will build you, the other will break you.

Is self-doubt a weakness?


Not necessarily.


If the drive behind your doubting of self is constant improvement and striving to be the best, no, it is probably not a bad thing.


It just means you hold yourself to a high standard and are driven, you have a sense of humility, you are aware of your limitations and are open to always learning and changing.


But beware, this form of self doubt can also be very stressful as you are carrying a whole different burden on your lonesome.


But, that is a topic for another day.

Now, should you find yourself sinking rapidly into self-doubt every time you meet someone, do something or present yourself, you have probably got some unlearning to do because you, MY FRIEND, are controlled by fear.


The sort of fear that leads you toward procrastination and causes you to delay the best version of yourself from actually growing from past mistakes and experiences instead of wallowing in them.


Past experiences can have a huge impact on how we react, especially if you have had bad experiences.


Being in an abusive relationship or being fired without a concrete justification, these are experiences that may cause our minds to take a huge hit. Experiences can shake and rattle our beliefs too. However, continuing to reference past experiences without learning from them is just a waste of your bright future!


How to Overcome Self-Doubt


Ground Yourself and Say Stop!


Once you discover there are negative voices running inside your head, try to stay in the present moment and focus on the positives.

Try to prepare something positive you can go to whenever you feel negative or unsure of yourself. Ideas on what you can prepare:

  • A list of counter arguments, things like “I can do this” or “It’s just another chance for me to learn.”

  • A list of bible verses you can refer to when facing self doubt!

  • A jar that contains happy memories

  • A file that contains all the photos that make you smile

  • A list of quick energy-boosting activities you can do

  • A box of healthy snacks that you can always go to

Take a Break and Get a Boost of Optimism

Sometimes the longer we feel stuck in a situation or emotion, the harder it is for us to come out.

Just take a moment to relax and shift your focus to something totally different. By doing so, it can allow us to clear our mind and look at things from a new and fresh perspective.

If you need an optimism boost, try make a list of things you’re grateful for. This will naturally shift your thoughts in a more positive direction.

In one study measuring gratitude, hope, optimism, and life satisfaction, “Gratitude was determined as the most predictive variable for well-being”. That’s a great reason to practice gratitude!

Don’t Be Afraid to Seek Help

While it’s important to work on ourselves, it’s also a good idea to get support from your loved ones, including family and friends. Don’t be afraid to ask for help.

They can be your partner, family members, friends, mentors, supervisors or even a coach.

Getting advice and reassurance from others can also improve our self-confidence and keep us motivated.

by Jessica Daniel


 

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